♥ Alright To Be Not Strong ♥: 2011

Problems are like eyebrows.

Everyone has them regardless bushy or thin.

And no matter how often you trim them, they still grow eventually.

So there's no point of running & hiding from problems,

face it and get a solution.

I have a very bushy one thou ♥

长大

很多时候明明受了委屈，却要装着一点都不在乎的样子。

不是不能向人低头，而是不露出自己软弱的一面。

为什么人长大后会有那么多的不开心？

-------------------------------------- ♥ --------------------------------------

final hope

If the day ever comes

don't say a word

I just need a hug from you

a hug which says

"I'm here and everything's okay now"

nothing much to hope for but for this

undone wish list

you've no idea of

the many places i wanted to go with u

things that i wanted to do when i'm with u

stuffs that i wanted to share with u

yet

you just have too many excuses for yourself

rather than to find ONE for me

hoping yet disappointing

not in the mood

to be continue...

It has been quite a while.
So,

This is an update, from me.

...
...
...
...

I need to talk
But no one's there, nobody
I wanna talk
But nothing came out
I need to express
But i couldn't puke out any

Everything went B.L.A.N.K.
But i'm suffocating.

.
.
.
.
.
.

The end
Sort of

p/s yea i know, i'm totally shitting. sorry.

你左我右

你左 . 我右

the impossible

The same person, same place

Though not the best, but I can't get another better than you ♥

02092011

Everything's been a mess lately. 1st the sleep, then the job load, now the c**. It's actually not that bad, but pretty heartache you know. B**per squashed & ripped off, just like banana peel. Only it definitely gonna costs much much much higher than any banana. So, until the babe is finally flawless again, I shall quarantine myself in the island for the next 2 weeks. And I think I've ruined someone's dinner. FML.

Rotting in my nest on a car-less weekend~ screwed.

Perfect Weekend

Nothing beats student's life. Well it's hell true. After two weeks of adapting to new environment, squeezing more brain juice to remember the job tasks, learning new and messy stuffs, etc etc... it's weekend again! Apparently, Facebook's news feed are all 'bout "TGIF!!", "2moro is FRIDAY!!", these kinda shout-outs on Thursdays' nights. Who cares? I'm havin half-day on Saturday. *Imbalance! Well, back to the weekends' issue. Seriously, outings are fun & fine, as long as I'm loaded, but sorry to say I'm drop dead broke & should cut down shoooooooping. On second thought, I guess I should cut down on the FOOD instead. This four-letters-word itself is already a well-known irresistible temptation. Bad for health~

Anyway, I found the lazy part of myself this weekend, together with things I really like since forever ♥♥

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a nice novel

heaps of fav songs

nice view

plus the afternoon breeze in the middle of the city

that's what i called --- a Perfect Saturday & Sunday

♥♥

filling in the _ _ _ _ _

i've got a job

i've got my car

i've got the best parents

i've got my bestie

what else am i missing then?

independent, not

4 years ago, while I was just like other kids, starting fresh at college, eager to rush back to "Home Sweet Home" almost every weekend. Dad used to say, "don't always come back, must learn to be independent!" --- that was pretty sad.

Now, 4 years later. The college girl has already grown up, graduated as a degree holder, with a job now. Supposed to drive there, and settle down myself. But this time, dad said, "I shall drive you down." --- what happen to me being independent?

Just being sentimental.

上集

放弃了

好累

《待续》......

insomnia

This must be my worst sleepless-night ever. wtf! I've been tossing and turning for 4 hours before finally dozed off at around 6am. All sort of things jammed in the mind at the same time, this and that, desperate and excited, frustrated and worry. wtf. And i'm already up at 10am. Guess i've too much in mind, plans after plans, but don't have the chance to execute it yet. Getting really restless these days, never felt this desperate before. Yea, i'm VERY desperate to get myself a job so that i can execute my plans. Now that i'm typing this out, my mind still have all sort of things floating direction-less. I'm babbling now i know. FML

WE

They said,

when your partner is demanding

it means that they really loves you

and expect the same from you.

otherwise, who cares? =)

Me + You = We ♥

会有的一天

如果有一天我不再关心你，

如果有一天我不再在乎你，

如果有一天我不再烦着你，

如果有一天我真的累了，

你要想想我为什么会累。

那时，请你不要责怪我

到时，请你谅解我。

背着你走很久，

要放下一下下

因为我一点都不强，我没那个能力。

我只是个小女人。

如果有那一天，记得给我充电。

stupid dilemma

I know this shouldn't be a dilemma. But still, kelisa or saga??

The former is my fav + easier to manage, but a used car.

The latter coz dad loves it, and it's new.

arrghhhhhh~~

I hate proton!

(Translate: Please don't blame Proton-for stop producing Savvy due to low quality- Proton produces 700 cars everyday, with an average of 98secs/car, we don't have time to check every single piece of the components)

See how irresponsible they are?

How can one possibly feel safe? yucckss...

give.take

There are times when the whole world turns you down, u hope that someone will actually brings you up. Reward that someone with a SMILE =)

Coz' it's always had to do with --- Give & Take.

7.09

went out with Sharon this afternoon. my very first official ride in 小青!

Starbucks was crowded, so we ended up in Edo Ichi Sushi.

very likey the environment, giving 4 stars for the deco and the feee-ill ★★★★.

food was not bad thou, but if were to compare to beloved Sushi King, the portion served is a lil bit smaller. prices for the non-sushi menu are much expensive too.

i cheat. picture taken from somewhere =)

Miss Sharon indulging in sushi

the food-less picture

★★★ given. teeeheee =)

Starbucks next time! ♥♥

初恋 . 次恋

每个人的初恋，大都十分纯情。

跨过了初恋，爱情就出了很多姿态。

有人变得风流，见一个爱一个；

有人冷漠，再不会拿出真心爱第二个人。

不是每个人都适合与你白头到老。

有的人，是拿来成长的；

有的人，是拿来一起生活的；

有的人，是拿来一阵子怀念的；

有的人，是要一辈子珍惜的。

（摘自微博）

C.O.L

there's nothing wrong with crying out loud, isn't it?

cry out loud

wipe off the mucus

breath hard

toss everything away with the tissues

released

哭过就好了啦~

that's for this time...

COL again next time =]

u definitely have no idea how much suffer am i.

this is how it's like

♥♥♥

Some days i want to go back to the day when love found us, when you took my hand. Some days i wanna take a break from everything and make time to fall in love with you again, and you fall in love with me again... ♥

明天和意外

据说，这是世界上年龄最大的一对夫妻，他们的年龄加起来都有208岁。他们说，即使做了那么多年的夫妻，睡觉前也一定要互相说声 “我爱你” 。理由就是，如果有一天其中一个人没有醒来，至少他对对方留下的最后一句是 “我爱你”。

能携手到老，并不是一件，每对夫妻都做到兼容易的事

更何况可以维持着对对方的感情，依然不变地互相扶持。

爱，就要说出来，表现出来。

因为谁也不知道，“明天和意外”，哪个会先来。

不要认为，人家会知道你在想什么。

他们不是你肚子里的那条虫。

emotions vs feelings

They always said, try control your emotions, you'll amaze of what you'll find when you're not under the control of emotion. And yea, you could control your emotions, the sensation within one body, frustration, depression and even anger. Like when you're out with a bunch of friends and they ended up some place which you totally not wanting to spend your time in. Most of us would start cursing in the heart, hoping they'll leave the place soon. Of course, you wouldn't show it would you? I guess this is the simplest way in controlling emotions.

But, in contrast, you could not possibly control your feelings. You can't help it when you're happy, feeling excited bout something. It makes people feel so good that everything around you seems to be in the right place, though they usually don't. And you can't control the feeling of being sad and moody. Who wants to be sad anyway? When everything becomes so tasteless and meaningless.

Easy to say, look at the bright side, think from other point of view. But how often can u see people actually being optimistic? How can you expect the universe to reward you for not being a jerk?

It's part of life.

That's all.

it's nothing

it's your 1st tomorrow. trying so hard not to be annoying at the same time being supportive to you. texting and calling don't sound very good, let me assume just for once. just wanna tell you, don't give too much thoughts 'bout it, it may not be that bad after all, being optimistic as you always do right. just give your best, and leave the rest to fate. best of luck and the force will always be with you.

oh well, i'm just talking to myself here. don't expect you will get this either.

就这样

喜欢在你打机时偷瞄你

就是喜欢看你皱着眉头，很serious的样子

等你问一声 zomok?

然后对你傻笑

继续毫无目的地 scroll 上 scroll 下非死不可。

其实心里挣扎着

好想任性一次说

我不要回。

这一次的拜拜，就是一两个月了。

你要给我乖乖。

打着打着

心酸酸地

喉咙被呛到下下

听见了你再次的 zomok?

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该死的，是谁发明了距离这鬼东西?

distance

Distance

no matter how short it is,

it's still called distance.

it's an obstacle

and it shouldn't be an excuse

i supposed?

getting nowhere and somewhere

2 weeks!! nawh, it's nothing, just that i'm still UNemployed. how frustrating. as much as i love to laze around doing nothing, but it seems like 2 months to me right now. been surfing the internet for more than 12hrs a day, think i know where my massive headache for days comes from. well, nevertheless, i've an upcoming interview this thursday which i must say i'm pretty excited! till then, wish me luck!

by the way, this must be an one-in-a-million-UNemo-post. cherish!

突然累了

你要的不是我
心碎的失去轮廓
曾经给你的感动
只是情绪的波动
能给的不是我

我被遗忘在
你遗忘的角落

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

...

人生，不就是一连串的选择吗？

然而决定的权利往往都不落在自己的手上。

我选择了你

选择了留你

但我没权利决定

这就是人生。

the unexpressed

How do you tell a person how u actually feel, without them fooling around trying to change the topic?

How are you gonna tell the person, that you really want him in life, and couldn't let go just like that?

How do you say "i'm sorry" for not able to go with the plan as agreed?

How do you convince someone that the decision to settle anywhere is not of their concern?

How do you make the person understand the fear and sorrow in you?

How do you tell them to remove something that annoys and hurts you long ago?

How do you tell someone it kills you for the waiting?

How do you tell someone that you tried so hard to hold back the tears every time they try to be nice to you just for the sake of you, not from the heart and it hurts badly?

How do tell the person that it's sooooo hard to keep a smile that last 24hours in a row, knowing that you're only random-access-memory of their heart?

How do you make them understand all above?

It's rather hard to express verbally most of the time, the words just don't seem to came out right from the mouth. Especially when it comes to the feelings part, you kinda have this dust ball stuck right inside your throat and you go bla bra bra.......... Things get worse when people, who you're trying to talk to, are not into what you're gonna say. Often people forgot about the roots to these matters ---- the feeling & the willingness. The feeling of care, and the willingness to care.

For now, i think i've lost both the feeling, not my feelings that is, and the willingness to care. No matter how hard i've tried, it just won't find its way back. Reality is there Just don't feel like being an ostrich anymore, the more aware i am, the further i dug i head into the ground. Fear for facing the naked truth brings more hurt than i ever expected. I'm near to suffocation thou. It seems like getting to nowhere. Obviously, i'm fooling nobody but ownself, can't even tell the black or white, the truth or opposite.

No offence, this is where i express my unexpressed.

by Bitter Stickgirl

Reminder: Keep hanging on!!

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the dilemma

This thing, no idea what people called it, happens in every stages in our life.

You see,

when we were young, we wanted so badly to grow up quickly, so that we can reach the toilet light switch easily without having to climb up a stool.

when we're finally a teenage, we would think about those days when we were kids and need not to have so much so-called dilemma.

when we are finally in college, facing with endless test and assignments marathon, we wish to end it as soon as possible and enter into the corporate world.

and last but not least, when we're finally graduating from uni, on the way to be financially independent, we wish the time would somehow turn back itself and that we won't have to say goodbye.

Well, i have to say this is life. We enter into a new stage and we move on. What's left are memories, and memories are somehow bitter-sweet at times. Nevertheless, it's time to move on and proceed to the financial-independent-stage. BUT, here's the dilemma. Where should i settle my ass at? And the most interesting part, i don't really know how to get started. I seriously need someone's advices. No directions, no aims, no determination. That's why i'm unable to settle my mind yet. *Giggless~ Let's just forget how ignorant i can be. Think i'll just sit back and THINK hard, real hard.

Everyday is THINKING day i supposed??

errmm... any suggestions? any directions?

Feather in The Wind

I'm a feather in the wind
I'm up and then I'm down again
and though the places i have been
to heavens gate and 'round the bend

Things are never what
They appear to be
'Cause everybody's trying to grab a hold of me
So catch me if you can
Set me free again
Like a feather in the wind

I'm a reflection in the glass
'Cause i cant keep from looking back
And though the pages that i lack
Are stuck inside a broken past

Things are never what
They appear to be
So i'll dig a little deeper
Than what the eye can see
And if anybody asks
Making friends at last
With my reflection in the glass

I'm softer than a bride in white
But i'm tough enough to fight my own fight
Sometimes higher than a quivering kite
More lowly than a beggars plight

Like a fire in the night
I'm burnin up with all my might
Don't wanna flicker out of sight
Fade into the morning light

Things are never what
They appear to be
Cause only time will tell when
I'm ashes at your feet
So when i'm burnin bright
Let me be your light
Like a fire in the night

Things are never what
They appear to be
So many different pieces
Make up the whole of me
So hold me in your hands
Take me as i am
'Cause i'm a feather
I'm a reflection
I'm a fire in your direction
I'm unruly
I'm undone
So just love me as i come

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

And yea, we go up & down in life

As things were never the way we wanted it to be.

Just follow the flow, and hope that one day

the universe may reward you.

last of the last

I hereby declare myself a 'considered' graduate and officially unemployed!

Just kick the last paper's ass this morning, and that's it, my student life is officially over. Anyhow, there's mix feelings, i bet everyone does. You know, those "I hate-but-I love-this place" kinda feelings. Plus the dilemma of whether to further pursue or where to settle down.

Well, that's not the things in my mind right now. I just wanna enjoy my very last few moments to the max!

Next thing on lists, is just relax, enjoy the remaining days and looking forward to our graduation trip to Langkawi~~ *wooooooot!

Is this what you're feeling right now peeps? =D

Happy 2-years-Degree My Dear Friends

& Happy Unemployed!!!! ♥

sweating & swearing

The weather has gone nuts! It has been 4days of full 100% sunshine, without a single shade of cloud. Was wondering is it now 40 degree Celsius? This is rather annoying as there are people here who's having their finals and full concentration is needed. duhhh~

Really, everyone had been complaining 'bout the scorching heat and the irritation of sweating. It's HOT, HOT, HOT n HOT, all over Facebook.

C'mon~ spill some over here will ya??

I would rather have the place flooded than being roasted alive~

there should be 40 degree Celcius by now. *sweating & swearing*

now this is wad u gonna turn into when u're outdoor.

being roasted alive!

bet no one ever wanna come out of shower as it's the coolest place right now.

but, the water had been heated up as well. *smackforehead*

the worse part ever: you'll still gonna sweat out of your life even you're sitting real still without excessive movement. *swearing2

well, all we ever wanted is just...

some downpour!

无奈.无助

真的

无奈

无助

更加的无言...

亲爱的心，听话点好吗？

亲爱的眼泪，振作点好吗？

"Everyone in life is gonna hurt you,

you just gonna figure out which people worth the pain and tears "

In life, you may choose to bear with any consequences

But sometimes, you just don't have the rights

rights to choose

rights to love

rights to be loved

It's cruel, it hurts, but it's reality...

mid of the last

A very old fashion way to say, "a blink of eye", and it's already the mid of last semesters. So wanted to enjoy this very last moment of being a student to the max but at the same struggling with all sorts of marathon. First comes the VIVA presentation, which It can say it's a major relief that it's finally a "past tense". I bet the only part most people enjoyed most is get to be professional for a day and cam whore a whole damn lot. Then it's the mid-terms + assignments marathon. Non-stop I can say, one after another. You ought to be lucky when you find yourself still catching up breath. And As much as I wanted so badly to improve the grades, but these theory paper really put a hold on the effort. And the plus-size articles, really, it's demotivating max! The only subject that manage to fish my attention and is finance. C'mon~ it's the only paper that you can actually exercise your brain and get some senses. I'm aiming for it, but god knows?

March...

the month of happenings~~
Not to mention involvement of various emotions. Just like rojak. You can't even differentiate which and which. One second you're feeling in heaven and next thing you know, you're in hell. Well, blame it on the emotional intelligence. Of course I do really really really hope someone above can grant my only wish, well, two actually. I don't wanna stay in Rojak Mood for the rest of this semester. It's aching from the inside to be frank, to be purposely-unintentionally-absent-minded.